Tuesday, January 11, 2022

Loss IV. The inevitable

Untimely loss isn't something one expects to face during one's life. For instance, I lost my then seven year old cousin to a rare genetic disease when I was in my late teens, my father- in my early twenties, a classmate soon after and my mentor in my mid thirties. 
Timely loss- however expected, one still doesn't look forward to. Loss of a grandparent is one such loss. I lost my paternal grandparents in 2012 and 2015. And my maternal grandfather last month. His impending death was something I expected ever since I was a child considering my grandmother kept reiterating this eventuality. My memory of how I knew that he was diagnosed with Parkinson's disease is fuzzy. It was over a decade ago. We knew how it's all going to go down and though the doctors tried to make things as easy as possible for him, it's something that is difficult to control and especially at his age. That he fought through his condition and managed to do most tasks on his own till as recently as last year is a testament to his sheer fitness and resilience. I have seen others give up much sooner.
His condition had been deteriorating exponentially for a year and we knew what was to come. We made things comfortable for him but it was not easy seeing him confined to his bed, slowly slipping away further and further and there was nothing we could do about it. He finally passed peacefully one afternoon at the age of 90. Over the last six years, our lives had revolved around him- to make him comfortable, to assist him for any task, to make sure that he was never left alone and it was hardest on my grandmother who he had been with for the last 64 years. We had his body cremated after which his ashes were scattered around in the garden of his house. No fuss, no  ceremony. Just as he would have wanted.  

When my father died supposedly well before his time, I was happy in the knowledge that he lived to the fullest and without any regrets. I felt the absolute same for my grandfather.