How does one cope with the passing away of a loved one? This question has been hounding me for a long time. Why do we sometimes revel in the ache? Almost as we enjoy it. We want it. It’s because pain is good. We pity on our own self, and take vulgar pleasure from it. The twinge that I fell so deep within me, is so necessary now, that I will not be able to live if devoid of it. Why are we never satisfied? Why do we keep wanting more. Loss is inevitable, then why do we hope against hope?
Anguish is something very individual. My way of expressing it differs from others, but does that make me less compassionate? I lost many people I loved so intensely, one still exists, but distanced. I feel extremely sad about the one who exists. I fondly remember ones who don’t. The have moved on, leaving us behind, and so must I.
To someone who didn’t exist for me a while back, why do I feel such pain? Why do I feel so incomplete? He is there, behind a glass wall, I can see him, talk to him, I feel an extreme affection for him, but I am refrained from expressing it. Such is my dilemma. The dead have gone and left me with good memories, and the living are distancing themselves, causing an excruciating agony, that is growing, and not healing with time.
I am incomplete, and will remain so, till I convene with those who have left me for good. But then I will still remain incomplete since the living will keep haunting me, when I am dead.
2 comments:
This piece of text seems to be highly saturated with profound feelings …. I must convey that you are good at morphing your thoughts into text.
"While I thought that I was learning how to live, I have been learning how to die." ~Leonardo Da Vinci
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Feelings are always profound. We just don't realise the intensity of those.
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