Excuses

Being dumped by the love of your life is a terrible experience to go through. Unfortunately, I've been through it twice. But the difference between the first one and second one was the way I dealt with it.

The first unceremonious dumping made me wander around the city aimlessly with my notebook and camera by bus and on two feet. During the second (equally unceremonious, if not less)- I had my bike and would go riding away on a drizzly afternoons on the outer roads of Pune alone, listening to music which I stopped listening to soon after that phase. One fine drizzly afternoon, after having partially recovered from flu, I decided to push my luck and try to somehow be at Senapati Bapat road near Chaturshrungi at 6.15 PM. I left home quite early, thus giving me about an hour to kill. So my plan was this:

To call up my unsuspecting friend staying at Baner asking if I could visit him for some time. This way I could go around the longer route from (Pune's) Chandni Chowk to Baner, visit my friend, kill time and then be at Chaturshrungi at the above mentioned time.

As I left, it started raining. I took shelter under a tree and it stopped raining. Then it started raining again as I started and I took shelter under a tree twenty meters from the first one. The i wore my rain jacket and rode off regardless of the rain. Climbing up chandni chowk was taxing considering i was still weak from three days of flu. As I rode down the hill towards baner, I felt calm. Like I had a plan in my mind and I knew what I was doing whereas in reality, I had no plan. I was just taking a chance and timing myself.

I met my friend at his house but not before crossing gigantic slush patches before his society entrance. I had to walk the cycle here. Oh the horror!

My friend made coffee for me. We spoke and I transferred some of my flu virus to him and he fell sick after that, but that is another story.

And then soon enough, my mind told me it was time to go. After all, I had to reach Chaturshrungi by 6.15 PM. I rode out towards senapati bapat road with a sudden rush and a sense of something just about to happen... 6:15 PM and I had just reached the University signal. I was late. What if I missed it? What if something happened which I didn't take into consideration?

But I persisted.

I rode up to Chaturshrungi.

I rode beyond Chaturshrungi

And sure enough, I saw him.

Mission accomplished? Well, not really. I said hi, we walked home, ate burgers on the way and went home. But things just went downhill from there. In a fit of sweet hysteria, I admitted that I had feelings for him, but you see- he saw through me better than i saw through myself. I was a fool. Things were better later as the situation between us grew into an initially awkward, but later comfortable friendship.

But keeping stuff at the back of your mind is not the best thing to do. And the human mind is made up of all kinds of memories. And it went further downhill as memories kept creeping up at the wrong time and wrong place.

I don't know whom to blame for this, and I don't want to. But my only hope is that years from now, if we ever remember this, we can laugh at it.