I call my blog experiments in life, love architecture and photography. I have all but given up photography and experimenting with equipment and images. As far as architecture goes, that's something I do experiment in, but don't write about (at least not here) and I've been somewhat unlucky in the love (of all kinds department) so hardly any scope for experimenting there.
So I've been writing about life in general. No experiments.
Which is okay. I'll keep doing something or the other and that will surely get documented in many of my other blogs (I am a prolific writer. Well, not quite. Just that I wear my writing and content thin over many blogs. Yes it gets diluted and it does eat into my already packed schedule but I must get out of this parenthesis otherwise I'll get stuck in it forever)
But today, I want to write about something significant that happened towards the end of the last year in my professional life. I started teaching in an architecture school as a visiting faculty in 2011. All because De sir cajoled (nay coaxed) me into it. I always wanted to teach but I felt it was too soon and I had nothing to share with the students. But his argument was that no body is really ready for it. One has to start somewhere and evolve. Right. I started off with first year Architectural design and Quickly moved to Second year Architectural design. Architectural education being what it is, and design studio sessions being what they are, my job was never giving lectures, but giving design gyaan and being a guide to the students. Well, not entirely. These do include an occasional lecture or two, but no standard stuff. It could even be a strong opinion monolog, or a presentation (with lots of graphics and one liners) one has to give to inspire students to design better.
So after almost five years of guiding second year students with their design projects, I finally thought of taking a semester off. Which doesn't mean much because I visit college for four hours only twice a week. and that too only a grand total of about 7-8 months in a year. The remaining work time, I have a busy work schedule as an architect.
Coming back to taking a semester off... Well that didn't happen. What happened instead was this: I was ambushed by the senior faculty and found myself retracting my request for a semester off and agreeing to guide students for their fifth year final design thesis. In my mind I was swearing and you must know that I hardly swear. When I swear I really mean it. So here I was, swearing in my mind, armpits sweating profusely, brain spiralling and my imagination working overtime with numerous scenarios showing me failing each and every one of my students whom I might possibly guide. What... Oh what made such senior, qualified and experienced faculty of one of the better college in town think that I- the unconventional, under-qualified and frankly a bit too casual for school rookie was fit enough to be a thesis guide for the final year students (Incidentally all of whom I had taught in second year.)
I could only think of one thing. Lack of qualified faculty. It's a real thing and they admitted to it too, but also felt that I would be able to guide my students not too shabbily.
Now, here's the irony: My own fifth year thesis was a disaster. I took things too casually. Sure, I had lost my father recently but that honestly isn't an excuse. The fact of the matter is, I am not a hard working person. From the time I remember all my teachers had only one thing to say about me: Can do better if I apply myself. (Well, what am I, fevicol?). My college academic co-ordinator (after repeated warnings and attempted inspirational one on one talks) had given up on his ambitions for me by the time I was in fourth year. And for whatever reason, I don't write exams well despite knowing stuff. AND I HATE STUDYING. It's only after so many years that I realised that I've effectively and systematically obliterated any chance of ever qualifying for a masters course in a good university. And I would expect that the students deserve some guidance by someone who has had a bit more formal education than me. Also, the second reason I was surprised that they asked me to guide students with their thesis is that the academic co-ordinator who had give up on me in college, is the Director of the college I teach at now and is very much involved with the design thesis decisions in the college.
I was already shitting bricks at the prospect of guiding Thesis students, but De sir had suggested the same to me a few months. If my mentor and other sensible senior faculty members had confidence in me, I had (a la sound of music) confidence in sunshine, I had confidence in rain, I had confidence that spring will come again, besides which you see I have confidence in me.
And I had De sir.
And then I didn't.
Gingerly, I have been learning to tread the rather tepid waters that is the all consuming fifth year design thesis. All this while, I thought the second year design discussion with individual students used to overheat my brain. That, in hindsight seems like a walk in the park. What helps is I love to talk design philosophy and construction technology. Quite passionately too. What I lack in experience I'm trying to make up with more reading and exposure. I sometimes do feel I have a bit more experience about some stuff through my travels and all the experiments and interaction with so many professionals from different fields. I'm enjoying the ride, stumbling occasionally and getting guidance from others.
Oh and since I'm a visiting faculty, I don't get paid more for teaching fifth year students. That's a bummer.
So what started off in my mind as a short blog post about me being pseudo-promoted to guiding fifth year students has turned into a rather long pseudo-semi-rant about... well... I don't know what exactly. And since it has been typed in a flow, I'm sure there are many errors. So I'll publish it for now and keep editing as and when I notice them. (I am my worst proof reader, you see.)
I think I overuse/misuse parenthesis. (Also, I love saying parenthesis)
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